Tuesday, December 05, 2006

On receiving a rejection letter from a publisher...

From A Few Words Before We Go...

Dear ejh
We are writing to express our delight that we are able to reject your application for a post within our organisation.We understand that you may feel disappointed by this rejection and we would be extremely pleased, to the point of jubilation, if this were so. We wish to make it clear that causing you personal unhappiness is a goal towards which we attempt to strive and we are delighted if we are able to achieve it.

Frankly though we must tell you that we were extremely disturbed that you should have considered applying for a post here and we are conducting an urgent review of our systems, personnel and procedures to ensure that such a thing never occurs again. Even the thought that you might have liked to be associated with us fills us with a feeling of self-loathing that is only partially ameliorated by the joy we feel in turning you down. We feel slighted, but worse than slighted. We have been insulted, but worse than insulted. We feel dirty. But worse than dirty: we feel unwholesome...



Anonymous Maria said...

Brilliant! But I hope this doesn't mean you've just received a rejection letter!

December 06, 2006 12:49 am  
Blogger Leighton Cooke said...

Phew! That's what I thought too till I saw the link. It's late and I've had some of Santa's mulled wine so my concentration is not the best, How's the lurgy? Better I hope.

December 06, 2006 1:47 am  
Anonymous David Duff said...

Justin is sensitive little soul but, my goodness, how very much he enjoys his suffering. Alas, I cannot resist a smile at the alacrity with which his former boss accepted his resignation. It says so much about him!

December 06, 2006 9:28 am  
Blogger Rachel said...

I haven't just had a rejection letter, fear not!...I have a lovely agent so he does the taking the book to publishers and being rejected for me.And the book has a publisher and will be out in July.

I was just directing people to Justin's blog which I think is a corker.

Lurgy-wise: it's bronchitis, it's a bad bout, and I am on antibiotics, but getting better. Not supposed to be out the house.

I have a Czech TV crew coming over at 2pm to interview me for a documentary - I said yes ages ago before I was ill - so I had better go and tidy up.

Hope you are all well and bug-free

December 06, 2006 11:18 am  
Blogger Julia Buckley said...

This is fantastic... I'm not in rejection letters-ville yet, but I can imagine how it feels.

December 06, 2006 4:40 pm  
Blogger jailhouselawyer said...

Hi Rachel

Here's my rejection letter to the TV Licensing people...


Wednesday, December 06, 2006

The familiar envelope lay upon the door mat face up, having just been delivered by the postman, TV Licencing logo, catching my eye. I thought, 'here we go again'. (See TV Licencing case, archive, November 11). The letter is addressed to "The Legal Occupier". Its a title of sorts I suppose, but I prefer to use my own name. The letter is headed threateningly "OFFICIAL WARNING - THIS PROPERTY IS UNLICENCED". I am sorry, but I do not take kindly to an organisation that assumes it has the power to issue me with an official warning. Especially, as I have done nothing wrong to receive such an official warning. I am not a naughty schoolboy in front of a headmaster at school. I am past all of that. The letter states, "You are hereby notified that we have authorised officers from our Enforcement Division to visit your home and interview you under caution, as our records show there is still no TV Licence at this address and as yet we have received no response to previous communications from you". They can send the whole division for all I care. I will send them packing without even letting them inside the house, let alone interview and caution me. I have made my position clear, "there is still no TV Licence at this address" because I don't want one nor need one, if they don't like it tough shit. It is a false statement to claim "we have received no response to previous communications from you". If my going to court upon receiving a summons and defeating the prosecution is not classed as communication ie sending a strong message, then I don't know what is!

"Your statement will be taken in compliance with the Police and Criminal Evidence Act 1984, and is the first step in our action to prosecute if we find evidence that you watch or record television without a valid licence". My statement will not be taken, because I will not be making one. The last time it was not in compliance with PACE, because there was no evidence to find. I could not believe that I was prosecuted in the absence of evidence. Even more absurd was the magistrates finding that I was technically guilty. On appeal to the Crown Court, my appeal against conviction was allowed. It might be a good idea if some of the TV Licence fee went on improving the communication breakdown within Crapita!

I deem these letters to not only be junk mail, but also to be offensively threatening in nature. If Crapita continues to send these letters, I just might begin my own legal proceedings against the company.

Posted by jailhouselawyer at 12:18 PM 0 comments Links to this

December 06, 2006 4:50 pm  
Blogger Rachel said...

Good grief Jailhouse, I feel for you. Utter incompetent twattery from the TV Licence mob. I take it you don't have a TV?

December 06, 2006 4:53 pm  
Blogger jailhouselawyer said...

Hi Rachel

Thanks for your kind response. As it happens, I do have a TV, but I use it only for CCTV, DVDs and pre-recorded tapes, and this does not require a TV Licence.

I am strong minded enough to fight back. However, I wonder how many other people do not require one and pay up rather than protest?

I watch 18DS from 7.30 - 12.00 and that's as close as I get to TV these days. At one time I use to watch it for 16 hours a day. Then I realised that I had become a prisoner to the small screen, and went from one extreme to the other. I don't think its worth £131.50 these days, you can buy a TV for less...

December 06, 2006 5:10 pm  
Anonymous seth said...

hi rachel,

geez ...in britain one has to have a LICENSE (oops licence) to own a tv set? shades of george orwells 1984.

i did hear somewhere that to own a vehicle in britain one has to pay all sorts of taxes,including a "road tax" to the ministry of transport,based on the size of the vehicle and how many miles (oops kilometers) per year its driven.Lastly petrol ( gasoline) in britain is almost triple what it is hear-around $6 us dollars per gallon im told..

hope alls well with u and j. i had such a good time seeing "casino royale" that i may go see it again.

seth :)

December 06, 2006 5:52 pm  
Anonymous ian said...

Seth, you're correct - In Britain you do pay a tv license, but that pays for the BBC channels, and the BBC radio channels, all of which are commercial free.
Personally I'd rather pay that fee again (I now live in the states) and get the, admittedly hit and miss at times, quality shows produced by the BBC rather than the crap filled (with a few exceptions) , advert filled stations we put up with here in the US.
The only non-commercial channels in the US are fee based (HBO,Cinemax etc) so it's the same basic system.

Petrol/Gas/Diesel/Derv - call it what you will is heavily (80%+) taxed in the UK. Life sucks sometimgs.
On the plus side that's prevented the spread of Hummers (I always have to laugh at that name) in Britain, which can only be a good thing, car wise.

Perhaps if the US charged $6 a gallon (especially for our smaller gallons!) we'd find ourselves marching toward gas alternatives a bit quicker? Also, for me it's about double (I currently pay around 3.40 a gallon). Include the fact that a UK gallon is bigger and it's not as big a gap as it seems.

The road tax is supposed to pay for the upkeep of roads and stuff like that. I'm not sure how true that is anymore, but at least in California we have the same thing, it's just hidden inside our state taxes and our vehicle registration fees (annual).
The upside of the whole road tax thing is it also requires you to have the car tested each year for all kinds of things (not just smog) which tends to keep the quality of vehicles on the road up a bit, or at least ensures they have things like brakes (for the most part). Thats called an MOT and most people in the UK dread them and now I don't live there I miss them likely crazy. Ditto for the driving test.
At least in CA you can get a license of the back of a Frosted flakes packet. You send in the barcode, copy of the receipt and your picture and they send you back a license to kill people.

Well, that was a nostalgic little rant for me. Back to dodging people who can't read signs, follow directions and change lanes in their hummers (hee hee) at 75 without considering someone else might be using it at the time.


December 06, 2006 7:13 pm  
Blogger Tom Tyler said...

Re jailhouselawyer's comments: I am in exactly the same position as you! I cancelled my TV licence about a year ago, (in fact, I phoned up the licencing people to make sure I was acting within the law, and they told me it was OK, I was) - I use my TV set only to watch DVDs and videos, and I've disconnected the aerial and detuned the set. This is perfectly legal, you can have a TV in your house without a licence, so long as you are not using it to receive any broadcast signals on the airwaves. So far the licencing company has not even bothered me at all.
Back to Rachel's post, though: As a small-time amateur actor, I often get rejected for parts in plays that I audition for, (it happened just the other week, in fact) and yes, it does hurt, no matter how hard you try and convince yourself otherwise. I do tend to personalise the rejection at first, and I drown myself in wine for a few evenings! It's a horrible feeling. Yet somehow, every rejection (once the initial blow to my ego has worn off) makes me think "damn them all, I'll keep working at being a good actor, I'll show them, eventually", and so it helps me develop a thick skin.

Rachel, you too are bound to get some rejection letters as you start off as a writer. I think the trick is to let those rejections "thicken your skin" as a professional, without letting them thicken your skin as a person, if that makes sense. If you feel in your soul that you are a writer, then you ARE a writer, no matter what any publishing house says to you.

December 07, 2006 8:02 am  
Blogger ejh said...

I was just directing people to Justin's blog which I think is a corker.

Very kind, ta.

December 10, 2006 3:48 pm  

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