Safe Distance?
This inspired me yesterday. The Forgiveness Project has inspired me before on this blog
By keeping a safe distance from people and situations that scare us, we disengage from the hope of resolution, says Ruth Scott
'To determine the kind of space that individuals or communities need in order to resolve conflict, we have to understand where each is coming from. Here again, breathing space is important. Without it there is no room for differing stories to be aired. Those who work in the arena of conflict resolution and restorative justice know that unless everyone feels heard, moving towards a just and lasting peace is nigh on impossible. Sometimes, in order to survive their own bad experiences, a person becomes desensitised to pain - their own and, as a consequence, that of others. Only through retelling their personal story in a safe space can they reconnect with its pain and through that begin to understand the pain they have inflicted on others.
In the light of this, a good distance might be defined as being close enough to be in touch with, and touched by, another's reality, precisely because we have stepped back far enough to make room for it.'
Ruth Scott, an Anglican priest, is a writer, broadcaster and a trustee of the Forgiveness Project Guardian Unlimited © Guardian Newspapers Limited 2006
Read the whole article
By keeping a safe distance from people and situations that scare us, we disengage from the hope of resolution, says Ruth Scott
'To determine the kind of space that individuals or communities need in order to resolve conflict, we have to understand where each is coming from. Here again, breathing space is important. Without it there is no room for differing stories to be aired. Those who work in the arena of conflict resolution and restorative justice know that unless everyone feels heard, moving towards a just and lasting peace is nigh on impossible. Sometimes, in order to survive their own bad experiences, a person becomes desensitised to pain - their own and, as a consequence, that of others. Only through retelling their personal story in a safe space can they reconnect with its pain and through that begin to understand the pain they have inflicted on others.
In the light of this, a good distance might be defined as being close enough to be in touch with, and touched by, another's reality, precisely because we have stepped back far enough to make room for it.'
Ruth Scott, an Anglican priest, is a writer, broadcaster and a trustee of the Forgiveness Project Guardian Unlimited © Guardian Newspapers Limited 2006
Read the whole article
posted by Rachel at 9:36 am
Strange that the age old idea of confession, repentence, contrition and attonment has been shortened to respect. A sorry which demands instant forgiveness isn't an apology - its a demand for a get-out-of-guilt card.
Respect is just the beginning. It creates the space that allows true feelings to emerge. As Ruskin pointed out, light can be far more terrible than darkness. True forgiveness is an act of joy, based in sanity. It knows no panic or insecurity.